3 Ways Suffering Has Made Me Stronger : Easter Edition
Maria Aloysius
Blessed Resurrection Sunday & Happy Easter!
What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger? Was Friedrich Nietzsche right in saying so ?
Yes!
Life challenges has taught me and still continues to teach me. Chronic illness and pain isn’t a walk in the park! It has changed me in ways I have never imagined. My ‘old self’ died and my ‘new self’ was born. Born again, resurrected from the dead. It’s what Easter is about. I am learning to accept and to navigate my life differently.
There is no way to evade suffering but
I can choose how I want to suffer.
I have a conscious decision to make, which is to participate either in :
A) voluntary suffering -Choosing to take charge and agree to accept and weather the distress inherent there, for we have an intention toward something we regard as more valuable to us
B) involuntary suffering -Consists of habitual, conditioned, repetitive behaviors with their attendant disturbing feelings and sensations. In this case we don’t take charge of the suffering; it takes charge of us
I choose A (voluntary suffering) but often times I participate in both, either unconsciously or consciously. Lately, I have been reflecting on focusing on how I can take charge and manage my pain & suffering versus it taking charge of me and my life.
Tricky! It’s an everyday challenge!
I have always told myself : Just because my body is in pain 24/7, it doesn’t mean my mind and emotions need to suffer !
I can’t control everything but I can control how and what I think! Suffering is about gaining new perspectives on life and those around you. And so here is how suffering made me the person I am today:
- I am more resilient!
I have become more resilient. Change makes you resilient. Pain and the unknown doesn’t scare me like it used to. I understand how pain works and it’s a sign that I am alive! I regulate my emotions. I am mentally and emotionally more stronger. However, I don’t presume have it all under control! There are bad and good days. I make the best of it. Pain has taught me patience, calmness. I might cry or get angry but I am resilient!
2. The comfort of being alone vs. feeling lonely
There is a difference. Enjoying my own company is something I’ve learned. Yes, we all get lonely at times but there’s beauty in being silent and alone. Solitude helps you reflect and observe your own habits and thoughts. My thinking had to be reprogrammed using CBT. I refuse to spend my time thinking depressing and negative thoughts while being alone. I want fulfilling, purposeful thoughts.
3. My Self Esteem and Confidence is through the Roof
I have always been a confident person. And now with pain and suffering? It has tripled or quadrupled for sure. I don’t care what others think of me. I am 34 and by the age of 40, I want to be living more authentically (not that I am not now). I mean learn more, grow more and stop overthinking and being anxious. I want to focus on healing my mind, body and soul.
NEVER FORGET! SUFFERING IS OPTIONAL EVEN IF PAIN IS INEVITABLE
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